Telling a tense person to “take a deep breath in” can backfire. A deep or forced inhale slightly increases heart rate and keeps the body oriented toward readiness. That’s normal physiology. But when someone is already anxious or tense, this extra activation can keep the stress loop going. The settling happens on the exhale. As the diaphragm relaxes upward, vagal influence increases and heart rate slows. A strong inhale tells the body: stay alert. A longer, unforced exhale tells the body: you can
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